#it's perfectly adorable and watchable

[castlebyersafterdark]

jockstraps are perfect for will and i honestly shake my head at the dearth of them in this fandom. buttttt do you think we could show some loving for mike in one too? as a treat?

maybe will finally convinces him to try one of his on during a looser steamy session when mike is feeling adventurous. even if he's not going to be topped by will - just for him to wear so will can admire his much smaller peach 🙂‍↕️

and maybe will can tell mike is feeling his oats when he's in it even if mike doesnt admit it, cos he looks a bit more red cheeked than usual and will catches him sort of caressing the fabric when he's putting the clean laundry away later that week. and so will buys him a jock as a surprise, in a darker colour to suit his style and go with the rest of his undies like the black ck boxer briefs 🙌 (when it's will's turn to do laundry, he's the one caressing those instead lmao)

i think mike would look so adorable in a jock it would be so tiny on him and just super sweet. i love the idea of him wearing it while he sees to will, just pulling himself free, and maybe they film themselves on the clunky old tape camcorder one time and you can just see mike's ass facing the camera, perfectly framed in more ways than one 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

Goddddd you're making me insane with this. Love it, need it, obsessed with it. Thank you for expanding on the vision.

Jockstraps are just such a hot look. Specific, but gosh it just works. Big brain idea, putting them both in one. I really enjoy the idea of them sharing in getting each other to try new things together, different reasonings, both in and out of the bedroom. Along with Will sometimes choosing clothing items for Mike to try, things Mike would never really go for himself. And Will likes dressing Mike up. Underwear, included.

Envisioning a nice emerald green, or navy, deep red. Classic black maybe. Mike stuns in those colors. Mike maybe feeling a little awkward in it the first time, kind of jarring being both covered and exposed, but he gets over it pretty quickly as they're making out, both undressed just down to underwear, and Will's the one grabbing his ass for a change. He likes the extra attention. Makes him feel good, feel desired. Especially in a change of pace. Typically Will's so preoccupied with his cock, which Mike is soooo not complaining about, but this is different. It's nice.

He'd absolutely look so cute, his small ass framed by the straps, pushing up with the slightest lift. He looks good. Feels good. Being able to grind and frot with all that delicious, teasing friction of fabric on fabric while still having the option of easy access to each other in a way. Keeping it on as Will plays with him and Mike rides his fingers. Wearing it while Will deepthroats him, it's pulled down just enough and Will's holding on tight to the elastic as Mike drives inside deep, mutually guiding each other along 🥵🥵🥵

The camcorder!! Them filming each other in general is so good - I can see Mike having ideas, camera angles, changing positions. They're not just filming themselves fuck, he's gotta make it cinematic. Filming Will in bed, lying there, writhing around as he poses and plays with himself and follows Mike's directions, looking up with his big eyes at the big camera propped on Mike's shoulder. Will giggling and grabbing the camcorder and making Mike pose for him, show off his body, embarrassed but excited now to do what Will wants of him. Mike taking it back and setting up the camera and then adjusting it as they switch into different positions. His ass in the jock, star of the show at one point as it's framed to capture him plowing into Will over and over again, and they look so good and raw and fucking hot on the grainy vhs quality. Mike, pouring over the footage to edit it together into something special, watchable. A different kind of movie night. He can't wait to show Will how incredible they look on film together.

[fourseasonsfigs]

Pearl of the East China Sea

Here we have the brightest boy in Jinling City - Zhang Zhehan as the young Lin Shu from Nirvana in Fire.

The inspiration for this fig is pulled from several different places in the show, but the primary inspiration was brief flashback scene near the end of Episode 40. It's been cut out on the version on YouTube, but it is watchable on Viki, starting at 39:00 in the episode. I can't download it from Viki, but I do have a small clip I downloaded from somewhere years ago that plays out this scene:

Apologies for the lack of attribution, I am not sure who originally posted this.

I took a couple screenshots in better definition so you can see more of the detail:

I hate to admit this, but I have not watched Nirvana in Fire yet despite it's epic reputation. BUT I'm hoping to start next week! I have a long flight ahead of me and plenty of time to get started on it's 54 episodes.

I loved this clip when I saw it because of how delightful it was - the young Lin Shu is adorable, with a smile that can really can light up the city.

He arrived safely tucked into his polystyrene box. The little cutout to the right side of him didn't have anything in it. My guess is that it was originally for his lantern, but (very thankfully) it came pre-installed. We won't need to have me sweating over trying to carefully slide it into his little hand.

The pearl is definitely as big as a chicken egg!

The (fish? frog? tadpole?) lantern in his hand is SUPER cute. It's also from the show as well, since I recall seeing a clip of him carrying it, but unfortunately I don't have a shot of it. When I watch the show I will keep an eye out for it, and come back and update this.

This is also a good angle to see the beauty mark on his left ear. This fig maker always adds the beauty marks to Zhehan and Gong Jun's ears.

The lantern is really too cute. Look at the little feet! I'm a complete sucker for those claymation animals with the googly eyes, and this totally reminded me of it. I'm so, so grateful that this didn't arrive broken and once again that I didn't have to wrangle glue on it to stick it into his hand.

The scales on the lantern! Such great detail.

I love figs with cloaks. Here you can see the little bit of detailing for the fur trim.

As you can tell by the fig stand, this little guy did not stand up on his own. You might think the weight of that enormous pearl might drag him forward, but no, the weight of his head kept tipping him back. I glued him down right away - no chance of this little cutie falling and breaking something!

He's not in his full armor here like he was in the clip, he's wearing clothes that Lin Shu wears elsewhere. I think it was a good call by the fig maker to have the clothes be recognizable enough without being overpowering. It really allows the pearl and the lantern to take center stage.

I love this fig, I think he's just so cute.

The fig maker really captured the youthful roundness of his face, and rendered his hair perfectly. The detail on the fur trim on his cloak is subtle but very nice. Just a great execution all the way around.

He's wearing black pants tucked into his black boots, but it's a little difficult to see due to the color.

It's easier to see from this angle.

You can see more detail on the guan here, and we have a nice shot of his hand holding the pearl and the googly eyes on the lantern.

I like the hair a lot on this fig, it's a great look.

This fig maker always has great box card art, and you can see the name of the fig here - Pearl of the East China Sea.

Material: Resin

Fig Count: 493

Scene Count: 31

Rating: Even more precious than a pearl

[link to the Master Post Index]

[dramalets]

Super Amazing 2024 Watch List

Jen's 2024 Watch List =)

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ────── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Like last year I watched a lot of stuff and some of it aired this year whilst other things didn't. So, as last year, I'll make a best of 2024 and best of the rest list. =)

Aired in 2024

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Profoundly Queer excellence - Marahuyo Project

Just beautiful. Every episode was great and it's ending warmed me to tears. Pinoy BL often has strong messages and this is some of the strongest I've seen but not once does it feel heavy handed or ham fisted. The cast of side characters are also magnificent, I defy anyone not to fall in love with Venice. (Side shout out to Nipple Talk which managed to be deeply queer and really fucking funny.)

Continued TayNew supremacy - Cherry Magic

TayNew always deliver for me and they managed it again. Every week this made me smile and kick my feet. Karan and Achi were a delight and the cast of side characters were as adorably watchable as the leads. Office romance AU done perfectly.

Live Event watch of the year - Pit Babe

Everything about this show was stupid. But the cast were absolute peak excellence, and absolutely know how to interact with fandom, and the acting was mostly extremely strong. It really was a peak watch a long as it aired experience though. Every week people had new crackpot theories and the best thing about this show was that any ol' shit post level theory could have been correct. Stunning.

I'm going to rewatch this forever and you can't stop me - We Are

Why was this show so fandom divisive? It was lovely, inoffensive and delivered me a delicious little gay found family every week. I bloody loved it and nothing will ever make me dislike it. The whole cast were superb and AouBoom were absolute fucking perfection.

Drama of the year - Love in the big city

I don't watch a lot of KBL because its largely very bleak and depresses me. This isn't not depressing but it's also extremely life affirming, warm and very funny. Nam Yoon Su is absolutely revelatory as Go Young and this one will live in my chest for awhile.

Non - 2024

[styomi]

My impressions regarding OPLA

I've never been shy about naming One Piece as one of my favorite, if not the favorite, anime/manga of all times. It's comedy, story arcs, character building, world building, etc, all of this makes it a great piece of entertainment and simply a wonderful journey to go on. So, here are some of the things I really liked and those which I liked a little bit less in the OPLA. (which was still really great in my opinion!)

SPOILERS for OPLA and One Piece under the cut

What I enjoyed:

Sanji. Let me just kick this off by saying that LA Sanji does such a great job. From the casting to the subtle differences and normalization of his 'quirks', Sanji is such a great character in OPLA. He is the perfect foil and 'calming down' factor for the lackluster Strawhats gathered up until the Baratie arc. While his flirting in the og makes him a bit obnoxious for me, the toned down version of OPLA is just on point. Everything is executed perfectly. The vocabulary he uses, the cooking, the fighting, the flirting, I'm just in love with OPLA Sanji. His backstory packs a punch, as it always did, and it doesn't feel rushed or forced. The crying is also on point. The only thing which could've been improved on was his leaving of Baratie.

Sets. The visuals are perfection. Like, this was it. It was One Piece. The world was there, in live action. All the little cultural details added and portrayed were absolutely stunning. I could see exactly where the budget went. It was on. point. I have nothing to add. It's perfection.

Fight scenes. All of the fans of the og I've spoken to were slightly worried about the adaptation of typical shonen fights, abundant in OP, being presented in OPLA. Needless to say, they were a perfect balance of flashy and entertaining, without going over the top or running for too long. Even Kuro's style was adapted amazingly for the live action. Here, I only have to add that Zoro and Nami seemed to overshadow Luffy a bit when it came to fighting, and this was a tad of a pity. With a little bit more screen time for the theatrics at the beginning of OP (where everyone is shocked to find out that Luffy has eaten a Devil Fruit), the issue could've been solved.

The pacing. Another thing which typically turned away anime watchers from OP og was the sheer size of the massive franchise. OPLA solves this issue very well, condensing and separating flashbacks, including them at different moments in order to provide for a more watchable show. Simply, great.

Side characters. I could go on and on about the amazing casting and screen time awarded to the side characters in the OPLA. Let me just list some of them who impressed me: Koby, Helmeppo, Buggy, Kuro. They shined. Every single moment of them was pure perfection. I was particularly impressed with Koby's portrayal. I was also on board with the slight addition of horror to Kuro and the Syrup village arc. I was completely in love with how Buggy ate up every scene he was in, going from a terrifying villain to a funny antagonist who is in for the ride with the main crew. Helmeppo's showcasing was perfect. I'm just impressed. I was shook. No other comments regarding this. Simply on point.

The different point of view. It's no secret that the og focuses heavily on the Stawhats. Their stories and development take the majority of the show, which is amazing. Still, the addition of little details, for the og fans, was definitely a treat. If I were to name an example, Mihawk's decimation of Don Krieg is a highlight. Small scenes which were off-screen in the og, being added to the OPLA, were satisfying to watch.

In conclusion, there were a lot of things I adored about the OPLA, but these were the ones I really wanted to highlight.

What I didn't like:

Zoro. As someone who was a firm simp for Zoro from the beginning of the og, I was a little disappointed with the OPLA version of him. The switch from 'a strong dumbass' to 'angsty swordsman' was a little bit too much for me. Simply, it seemed more like a Sasuke interpretation of Zoro, than Zoro. Like it was Sasuke acting as Zoro, or something similar. This, in turn, changed his relationships with the rest of the crew. The most painful one for me was his relationship with Luffy. Og Zoro never really disrespected Luffy nor was he ever visibly annoyed with his captain. OPLA Zoro is just... annoyed. Which makes one think - why does he even join the crew? Not to say that I hated OPLA Zoro, there were really some amazing moments to him. All the fight scenes were great, especially the Mihawk duel one. His oath to Luffy was also amazing. However, the 'unspoken first mate who is the backbone of Strawhats' really became a 'angsty man with anger issues and obsession with alcohol', which is, sadly, a simplification of his character.

Garp. While I agree that the depth added to Garp in the live action was great, too much time was given to him. If the focus had been more on Koby and less on Garp, I would've enjoyed the live action more. Especially the build up of Luffy's confrontation with Garp was anticlimactic in the end, where there seems to be no point in the tension which had been made previously. Simply, his appearance at the end of Water 7 was much more impactful.

Nami's arc. Nami's arc is one of my favorites from the og. Her emotional journey from hating pirates to loving Luffy and trusting him was too flat in the OPLA. Og Arlong was terrifying. Og Bell-mère's story was heart wrenching. Og Nami's decision to go with Luffy was inspiring. This arc was a huge set up for later developments with fishmen and it was simply amazing. One of the many situations where I applauded Oda later on when he expanded on the universe seamlessly. In the OPLA, this is missing. While Arlong is still terrifying, he doesn't quite pack the punch he did in the og. Luffy doesn't struggle nearly enough to defeat him, which makes later development of the universe, with Arlong as a strong character, hard to believe. Bell-mère's death made me sob like a baby in the og. It just passed by me in the OPLA. Just.. whoosh. I didn't feel enough. The emotional stakes weren't high enough. The build up wasn't there. Still, the scenes with Nami and Luffy in that arc were on point. Though, I did miss the situation where Luffy walks away from hearing Nami's story. And, I was admittedly impressed with Usopp's first highlight fight, which was left in the OPLA. Altogether, while this arc should've been the crown jewel of the first season, I felt like it really wasn't. The Mihawk duel was a much better scene.

Stawhats. I liked all of them - individually. However, their dynamic as a crew felt a bit off-kilter. Nami and Zoro openly saying 'not a crew' to Luffy all the time didn't sit right with me. Them agreeing on not being a crew simply left a sour taste in my mouth. The core of my issues with Stawhat dynamics is probably due to the change in the Zoro-Luffy relationship, which is the most charismatic in the og. Sure, Zoro wants to smack Luffy half of the time, but he doesn't. Nami is the one who disciplines the reckless captain. Luffy is the one who brings them together. The sheer disrespect (yeah, quoting here the OPLA 'mutiny') is what made their dynamics odd. And then, Usopp and Sanji being fully on board and invested made it strange. It should've been Zoro who provides the example, not Usopp and Sanji. Zoro, though, is not the one to give the faith, but instead to give the annoyance. In the end, Luffy could've definitely been more selfish. Og Luffy is charismatic because we never know what to expect from him. He's captaining how he sees fit, without consulting anyone. And it works. Og Luffy is admired because he is so eccentric. OPLA Luffy lacks that. He is unsure of himself, which makes him hard to like. While he surely is Luffy and he does an amazing job with all the necessary scenes, he lacks that conviction. And, in the end, it's his passion and conviction which makes OP so lovable, in my opinion.

To conclude, with a little more addition to recklessness and that dynamic of 'Jesus what is he doing but oh well I'm joining because it's fun' Zoro would've been on point, which would've solved the Strawhats issues. A little more time dedicated to Nami's arc would've made it pack more of a punch. A little less time to Garp would've tickled us to know more, later on. This was all solvable.

Does this mean that OPLA is not a good show? No. It's a great show. It's certainly one of the more amazing live adaptations I've seen, second only to the Kenshin movies. It's watchable, for both new fans and old fans. It makes the old fans want to re-watch or re-read the og. It makes new fans want to watch and read the og. It is visually stunning. The casting is amazing. It gives depth where needed. It makes the show appealing to all genders, races and ages of audience members. However, there is room for improvement.

Long story short, I'll be eagerly waiting to see if the dynamic of Strawhats and the climactic fights of arcs and the emotional build up in them are improved upon in the later seasons. Hopefully, we will see more of Luffy's charisma in the later episodes.

What did you think of OPLA?

[samglyph]

If you want a space to rant about ST season 4 and its horror flaws I would love to hear your thoughts---i just rewatched seasons 1 and 2 so I'm in the thinking about it mode

Ohhhh I’m vibrating with all I have to say but I’m going to stick to the horror flaw theme and leave out most of my other non horror related thoughts. Ok so starting off: I actually like most of the first three seasons of Stranger Things. I think season 3 is flawed in a lot of ways but there’s enough that I like there that it’s watchable for me. I know a lot of people feel differently so I’m just putting that out there first.

Season 4 starts strong. The first episode? Good! The dnd/basketball scene? Fantastic! The scene with Eddie and Chrissy? Adorable, great character building. I think one of the strengths of this show has always been the acting, especially from the younger actors, and I think that remains true. And in terms of horror, Chrissy’s death scene is super spooky.

Episode 2 is where it falls apart. The reason I said ‘horror rule number 1’ is because while it might not be a general hard and fast rule (there are plenty of things that don’t do it and are still good and scary), it’s generally accepted, especially in creature features (which ST TECHNICALLY IS) that you shouldn’t show off your creature right away. Jaws? You don’t see the shark until the climax. The Thing? You see people transform and mutate early enough, but you don’t see the full spider body horror monstrosity until well through the film. And Stranger Things season 1 does this perfectly; people are taken/killed left and right, but aside from a blurry photo we don’t see the demigorgon until the LAST EPISODE. Now, yes this is often done for budget reasons, but it’s a good technique! Not being able to see what you’re running from makes it scarier. Showing us Vecna in the second episode? His whole body? With his tentacles? It’s a cool shot sure, but it’s unnecessary and immediately makes him less scary. He’s just a weird dude! They’re trying to do like. Power scaling. But it doesn’t connect well to prior seasons and the world building is really finicky at best.

I know it’s season four and they’re trying to explain stuff because we’re coming to the end of the show and they want to wrap up the mystery, but here’s a thought: sometimes things…. Should stay mysteries. The upside down, as a concept, is very cool and scary, and in trying to explain it they just opened more cans of worms and it’s still a mystery but now it’s almost more fantasy/eldritch sci fi then the grounded sci fi that it was and so some of the believability falls away. Also adding magic glowing dust is a retcon and ridiculous we know that’s not how the lights work. And I LIKE alien eldritch horror ok you know that but that’s not what stranger things IS it shouldn’t BE HERE. Also making your villain just the “weird spooky probably neurodivergent child” trope? Don’t like it, I think they could have had Henry find a small portal to the (already existing I don’t think El should’ve made it) upside down and that corrupted him and mind controlled him and given him some base power (kinda like Will in season 2) would’ve worked just as well, but that’s just an idea.

Another issue with the horror: it’s rushed! Why is Max’s Possession scene in episode 4! It shouldn’t be there! It’s a great scene, but it’s WAY to great and climactic to be happening BEFORE THE MIDPOINT OF THE SEASON? There’s another climax with max but it almost feels less important despite the fact that she basically dies. AND WITH BARELY ANY OF THE CAST THERE? That’s a separate issue but really quick: horror partially comes from the awareness of the characters, and then the audience being aware of the characters awareness. Either the character is aware of the horror which can create stress, (ie. Watching Will in season 1 as he tries to avoid the monster in episode 1) or the character is unaware (shouting ‘he’s right behind you! In scream) which can also create stress. But in the latter section, the film/tv show/whatever has to emphasize that lack of awareness. Meaning if for instance, one of your best friends is about to die, and you’re a MAIN CHARACTER and you have NO IDEA, it might behoove the writers to nod to that somehow to twist the knife a bit. Like El is so important in the second Max climax but isn’t even remotely important in the first scene. Cmon. But that’s just my opinion and a little off topic anyway also the Russia stuff slows down the plot and I don’t care about it and they used a nazi prison and then tried to monetize it as a hotel experience Ls all the way down.

Tldr a lot of the horror was ruined because things were rushed/shown to early and overcomplicated. Something needed to be cut so that other things could flourish.

This is no where close to all my thoughts on season 4, trust me I’ve got a whole like. PowerPoint/video essay locked in here and also I have a head cold right now so apologies if this isn’t coherent. Or if I’m wrong I’m not watching the season again to check.

[maychild]

Color Rush review

So CR has been on my to-watch list since it came out in 2020, but i finally started watching it since I heard a second season is coming.

BUT listen, I like this show, I do, but, why, oh why, didn't WYEL didn't get a second season?? I dont mean to rag on CR because it's an alright show, (but only alright) but I just think WYEL is the stronger of the two??? And this is purely subjective since maybe some people think CR is stronger than WYEL, but I just reallllly wanted a second season for WYEL and to find out where all the characters ended up?? Did Han Tae Joo and Kang Gook end up in Japan together??? oR did they stay in Korea??? WHAT happened with Tae Joo's father?? Did he disinherit his son? Or did he leave him alone, to leave peacefully with Kang Gook?? Or is he still causing trouble for his son with his homophobia???? And what happened to Kim Pil Hyun?? Did he and Choi Hye Mi stay together & get married?? Or did they go their own separate ways???

I NEED SO MANY ANSWERS STILL TO SO MANY QUESTIONS.

That is not to say that CR didn't leave me with questions at the end either, but I didn't really care one way or another if they got answered or not...which is a bad sign if u want people to engage with the content.

Like, again, I do like CR, and i do like the plot and this whole fantastical nature where there are monos & probs and this whole dark-ish world-building where the color-blind people (aka monos) get obsessed with their probs (aka the people who help the color-blind people see color). BUT! again there was so much potential for this show to be groundbreaking, but it...wasn't. Again, this is purely only my opinion but having been intrigued by this show & its premise for it only to end up being just alright, but not something I could rewatch a million times, has left me cold. Maybe it was my problem having high expectations for a short drama.

Anyway, the show really only picked up for me around ep. 5 and i liked the mystery surrounding the vanished mother, but felt like they dropped the ball there as well. And the aunt was a fun character I wish we could've seen more of...

So, is it worth watching?? Well, yeah, but again, I just feel disappointed that the show could've turned out to be something great & amazing, but it wasn't, whereas WYEL was great & amazing, but didn't garner a second season when I feel like they should have.

Also, I can acknowledge that maaaybe i'm not being fair because I'm bitter about WYEL not getting a second season, and I can only hope that CR getting a second season will make me like the show a little more (as of now, the show is just kinda 'meh' and underwhelming...)

I also wanted more scenes with the side couple...Kang Min Jae and Jung Joo Haeng were mysterious and intriguing maybe precisely because their scenes were so short (understandable considering how short CR is, so I hope s2 gives us more of them...)

[columboscreens]

any thoughts on ms columbo

if you mean the show, which you probably do:

we do not speak of it.

mrs. columbo is a perfectly watchable, run-of-the-mill little show on its own, but it is not canon and never will be canon. it was immediately sworn off by the public at large and everyone attached to columbo who mattered, including levinson, link, and falk himself. even kate mulgrew never spoke of it. it's nothing to do with mulgrew herself, either, aside from her being cast WAY too young (like 30 years falk's junior lol. nobody liked the idea of columbo with a child bride for obvious reasons). in fact, they cast her as a last resort, because all the better-suited actresses refused to touch the project with a ten foot pole. and as anyone could've predicted, they had to remove all columbo associations a few episodes in, even renaming the series. it was doomed to fail from the very start.

i actually adore mulgrew on her own merits--captain janeway is iconic, and i remember her playing an excellent girlfriend of sam's on cheers. but mrs. columbo, she is not. the fussy autist in my brain always overheats when people in any way imply that she is.

if you mean the unseen woman herself: the magic is in the mystery! i think we all have our own little visualizations of who she might be; that's part of the fun. i've seen lots of interpretations. sometimes she's actually his husband, or trans, or big, small, really strong, an alien entity. all sorts of things. the important thing is that in all cases, columbo adores her.

(my personal visualization is a dark-skinned, kinky-haired, stubborn, bespectacled little sicilian thing who can't put a book down. i write fun little fanfics involving her here.)

[roughentumble]

A Comprehensive List of Henry Cavill's Movies And TV Shows, And Whether I Personally Think They're Worth Watching

**Updated and current**

as requested by the oh so lovely @fangirleaconmigo

obviously take this list with a grain of salt, as im just one man, and i certainly have my biases. and even if something is in the "not worth it" section, if something about it intrigues you, feel free to totally ignore my advice! sometimes the best evenings come from watching reportedly terrible films, and one of my favorite Henry Cavill movies was summarily panned by critics and audiences alike. that being said, let's start with the stuff i didnt like.

NOT WORTH IT:

Red Riding Hood

----> Available for free on youtube, and yet still not worth your time. Poorly made, often unsettling, with bad music (in a musical of all things) and children forced into racist caricatures. Very funny if you want to watch Henry Cavill suck on a lollipop and get punched by a farting werewolf, however.

Vendetta (A.K.A. Laguna, A.K.A. Hotel Laguna)

----> Technically semi-competent... I suppose it's a mob movie? Also his film debut! But it's largely boring, and the entire film hinges on a sexual relationship between teenage Cavill and an older woman. Genuinely and deeply uncomfortable when she fondles his bare chest, and it's inescapable how much he LOOKS like a child in this film. If I never see a teen that young kiss an adult again, it'll be far too soon. *shivers in disgust*

Sand Castle

----> A war movie, and not a very good one. While I commend it for its attempts at an anti-war message (a very "why are we even over there" vibe), that doesn't make the movie less boring or more watchable. Those who love war movies didn't like it, and it wasn't anti-war enough to seduce the likes of me.

The Tudors (TV)

----> I think my mom summed it up perfectly when she said, in reference to her attempts to sit through season 1 and questions of why she bothered, "there was less on TV back then." (She never made it into season 2, by the way.) It's like the other historical dramas of it's ilk, so if you go crazy for those feel free to give it a shot, but even among its peers it's kind of not great. From the era where showtime really was putting an eye-rolling amount of sex in their shows, so get ready to be accused of watching soft-core porno on the family television like I was.

That being said, a lot of the sex scenes are Cavill's, so if that's your poison, this show'll keep you well fed.

Night Hunter (A.K.A. Nomis)

----> Apocalyptically terrible writing and editing. The performances the cast gave weren't bad, and the camera work itself looked plenty nice, but anything good to be said about the film is dragged down by the foundation itself being utterly rotted. Maybe good to put on to mock... when you aren't confused or bored to tears.

Hellraiser: Hellworld

----> It breaks my heart to say it, because I did find joy in this odd little film, but it's so genuinely bad that I would be a liar to place it anywhere else on the list. Campy and fun in places, but largely just boring, slow, confusing, and BAD. Not a real Hellraiser movie, not enough gore to appease horror fans, not meta enough to be meaningful while still being so meta it drags you out of the story. Genuinely the ending doesn't make sense.

If you're wildly in love with Henry Cavill, you'll love Mike. I love when he gets hooked in the chest and dies, the "sweet cheeks?" line is iconic, his zombie look is adorable. I'm getting a tattoo of the meat hook from this movie.

Do not watch it.

.

MAYBE? I GUESS? I'M NOT YOUR DAD, I CAN'T CONTROL YOU:

Immortals

----> Some technically interesting work here, some nice fight choreography, and a unique visual style to the film. And yet it has such a blandness of performance across the board for all its actors, and such a confused and thoroughly Christian approach to what was supposed to be a story about greek myth, I could never recommend it to anyone. (Since when does Zeus "not interfere" in the lives of humans???) Just enough style points to eek it's way out of the "no" pile.

Whatever Works

----> Whatever Works is a Woody Allen film. This is enough to make it a controversial choice on its own. Certainly one of his lower quality works as well. Henry Cavill as Randy was a delight, however, so give it a chance if you watch Woody Allen movies! Not as bad as I thought it would honestly be, and again Cavill was really good as Randy, but I can't really in good concious put it in the recommend section.

Tristan + Isolde (2006)

----> Billing itself as an alternative to Romeo and Juliet, I mostly found the film to be boring, and I thought James Franco was a bland, boring lead. Other performances in the film were good (especially Rufus Sewell as Marke and Sophia Myles as Isolde), the movie looked fine, it just... was boring. Watch if you're an absolute sucker for this kind of period drama, otherwise skip it.

I Capture the Castle

----> I was deeply unkind to this film when I watched it. I didn't exactly go into it expecting to have a good time or with much of an open mind, which potentially colored my experience. I... didn't have a good time watching it, to be frank. But perhaps if you go into it with a kinder outlook, you'd enjoy it more. A film about love's many forms, how it often hurts us, and it's utterly illogical nature. If you bother watching it, I hope it's kinder to you than it was to me. Perhaps you'll even agree to walk with it through the bluebells, who knows?

.

DEFINITELY WORTH IT:

Stardust

----> Not really "a Henry Cavill movie", as he's only in it for a few minutes, but the film is an exceedingly fun fantasy romp that's well worth your time. It's something of a cult classic for a reason.

Count of Monte Cristo

----> Excellent adaptation of an old classic, delightful watch. Cavill as Albert was wonderful, Jim Caviezel as Edmond was fantastic, and the ending made me genuinely gasp and sit on the edge of my seat. I didn't expect to love it, and yet I absolutely do!

Argylle

----> You don't get a whole lot of henry cavill for your buck, but it's a fun goofy spy film that you could easily watch with the family! Sam Rockwell is also there, as well as Bryce Dallas Howard, and theyre both fun to watch. Ignore the fact the special effects look like they spent $12 on them, and allow it to just be a fun time, and it'll treat you right!

The Cold Light of Day

----> Nothing mindblowing, and Sigourney Weaver + Bruce Willis give shamefully bad performances. And yet, Cavill is a charismatic lead, the chase sequences appropriately thrilling, and it's overall a perfectly servicable action movie. Grab some popcorn and make a movie night of it, IMO.

Blood Creek

----> Another perfectly servicable film. Not blowing any minds, but fun while it's on. Unfortunately, the plot relies heavily on Nazi mysticism (a personal pet peeve of mine), and some of the CGI leaves something to be desired. But still, at its heart it manages to be a very fun horror flick, if you're into cheap horror like me.

The Man From U.N.C.L.E.

----> This is... a flawed movie. And it's extremely hard to recommend when Armie Hammer is so unintentionally frightening in his role as Illya. And yet, the intro sequence is so FUN, Cavill as a thief is so delightful, I'd be remiss not to recommend it. Fun little spy romp!

Mission Impossible: Fallout

----> It is a Mission Impossible movie. Not much more to say, you either love them or hate them, but they know EXACTLY what they're doing, and they have it down to a science.

Enola Holmes

----> A great time all around! Go into it expecting it to skew for younger audiences, and you'll have an absolute blast. 13 year old me would kill to watch this movie. Millie Bobby Brown was great as Enola, and her relationship with Cavill's Sherlock genuinely tugged at my heart, because I am deep down a huge sap.

Enola Holmes 2

----> Ditto! Same as the first, just as worth your time!

Lynley Mysteries & Midsomer Murders (TV)

----> Lumping these two together, as they're both one-off episodes of long-running, competently made, british police procedurals. The episodes are definitely worth a watch, though I can't speak to either series as a whole.

The Witcher (TV)

----> Obviously divisive among long standing fans of the series, and not without its flaws (S2E2, jfc), but ultimately for all my bitching, I'm a TWN stan, and Henry Cavill's Geralt owns my heart. Also probably the reason you're reading this list, so I don't feel the need to expand all that much.

.

YES, THE DC MOVIES GET THEIR OWN HEADING:

-> *long, beleaguered sigh*

-> ok so, like. ok. how much do you like superhero movies? how much of your life are you willing to devote to a zack snyder production that spent half the time setting up plot threads for a large expanded universe that the execs very suddenly pulled the plug on? how little do you love yourself.

-> jokes aside there are redeeming qualities in these films, and if you really love the characters i'm certain you'll find value in some of them.

Man of Steel

----> Despite my very real and present complaints about odd tone, too much illogical lip service paid to the armed forces, a runtime that makes me want to start throwing punches (Just skip the first 20 minutes exactly. They do not matter. They do not add anything), a sterility to the script, and lack of care or acknowledgement given to civilian lives (something at the heart of superman and present in THE AVENGERS, so to do worse than the avengers is pretty egregious)... IT'S STILL a decently fun and entirely servicable (apologies to Mr. Cavill for how many times I use that word in reference to his films) superhero movie. I like Cavill's Clark Kent! I like his little bouncy curls, and I like how much he loves his momma. Superman is fun! He's my friend. MoS worth it, if you can find it in your heart to spare 2 and a half hours for it.

----> VERDICT: WORTH IT

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice: Ultimate Edition

----> Don't bother watching anything other than the Ultimate Edition. It's the only one you'll find half the time you're looking for the film, anyway. This film, to me, is the sink or swim moment. Tooth-grindingly long, and more of what you got in Man of Steel. It's-- ok, I didn't like the Christ allegory, but that's also blatantly Zack Snyder's entire thing wrt Superman, so I can't blame the movie for being exactly what it said it was. If you can get through this movie and enjoy it, then the rest of the DCEU films will be a breeze, and you're now officially A Fan. If this movie is a slog that makes you wanna die, do not bother with any other DCEU films, this is the point where they're officially Not Your Thing (said with affection, not derision). Despite all my complaints, Superman is my best friend and I think about this movie constantly. Wonder Woman is the best. Clark STILL loves his mom(yay!!!). The fact they decided to tackle doomsday+the death of superman as their plotline for this movie is so fascinating to me that I'm giving them points for sheer audacity.

----> VERDICT: WORTH IT, KIND OF, BUT FEEL FREE TO TURN IT OFF AND NEVER WATCH A DCEU MOVIE AGAIN

Justice League (Joss Whedon's Cut)

----> *rubbing my temples* Everything within me screams to tell you not to watch this abomination of a film, because of Joss Whedon's obvious and blatant racism and sexism, but it is admittedly much shorter and a bit easier to follow if you're not a fan of Snyder's style or you're not a big comic book person. Whedon made reshoot decisions that removed the black character Victor Stone, A.K.A. Cyborg, from prominence in the plot. He was arguably the(or at least a) main character in Snyder's version, and Whedon cut his scenes extensively, and then added extra scenes to make Batman the protagonist instead. Not to mention adding in scenes of a slightly sexual nature that Gal Gadot(Wonder Woman's actress) refused to film, which he then got a body double for and digitally added her face in post. BUT!!! But. I must admit. 2 and a half hours versus 4 and a half hours is an appealing cut-back in length, and some people find it difficult to follow Snyder's exposition-heavy style. Plus there are a few added scenes of Superman which are genuinely adorable, if very short. If you're a fanatic, watch both. If you just want to watch one version... Well, I would recommend Snyder's, but weigh the pros and cons for yourself.

----> VERDICT: WATCH IT IF YOU 1) LIKE DC FILMS BUT 2) AREN'T THAT INVESTED, AND 3) ARE LOOKING FOR SOMETHING SHORTER OR PERHAPS EASIER TO FOLLOW. IF NONE OF THOSE CONDITIONS APPLY, DON'T WATCH.

Justice League (Zack Snyder's Cut. Also knows as "Zack Snyder's Justice League")

----> Genuinely unforgivably long. Zack Snyder, I don't forgive you for the length of this movie. AND YET I personally had a total blast with it. Coming hot off the heels of Whedon's cut, seeing Cyborg more fully fleshed out was like a dream come true, and some of Whedon's trademark 'humor'(which these days I find grating) is thankfully lacking. I personally find it to be a better movie, a better showcase of the characters, and all around more fun, but I had also innoculated myself against the strain of long Zack Snyder superhero movies by doing marathons of his other DC films before diving into this one. Also the film has a lot of references to future plotlines which will never fully make sense, because they were sequel set-ups for movies that never got made. Those parts are... hard to sit through, whether because of confusion/boredom or the heartbreak of knowing you'll never get to see that movie which doesn't exist(depending on your emotional investment). For some reason this film is split up into like 5 or more different "chapters", and I theorize that you could watch one chapter a day like it's an episode of television if you need to not watch it all in one sitting, and you might get a better experience out of it that way. Superman is here and he's still my friend! He still loves his ma soooo much! There's a super fun scene with his heat vision!! Wonder Woman and Cyborg and The Flash and Aquaman are here!

----> VERDICT: THIS IS THE VERSION I RECOMMEND IF YOU'RE SOLD ON WATCHING THE JUSTICE LEAGUE, BUT I WOULDN'T BEGRUDGE YOU IF THE RUNTIME SCARED YOU AWAY. WEIGH THE PROS AND CONS BETWEEN THIS AND WHEDON'S CUT, AND WATCH WHAT WORKS FOR YOU. AND IF YOU DON'T LIKE DC MOVIES PLEASE DON'T MAKE YOURSELF WATCH THIS.

Zack Snyder's Justice League: Justice Is Gray

----> Literally just Zack Snyder's cut of the Justice League, but in black and white.

----> VERDICT: PLEASE DEAR GOD DON'T WATCH THIS IF YOU'VE ALREADY WATCHED THE OTHER ONE. IT ISN'T WORTH IT. DON'T SPEND FOUR HOURS OF YOUR PRECIOUS LIFE ON "THE SAME MOVIE BUT IT'S BLACK AND WHITE NOW"

.

CHEAT FILM:

I must admit that, despite saying I've watched "everything" Cavill's ever made, I've only seen clips of his performance for the following film.

In Goodbye, Mr. Chips, he only has a 5 minute apperance. It seems a good enough movie, I suppose, but I couldn't bring myself to sit through hours of TV movie for 5 minutes of Cavill, especially not when his scene has been politely uploaded to youtube. His scene was moving, despite the fact I experienced it completely disconnected from the rest of the film, so make of that what you will.

..............

..........

......

...phew! ok, that's everything, i think.

feel free to disagree on any of my placements. also feel free to watch night hunter and then come yell in my inbox about how it sucked, because i am constantly shouting into the ether about it and no one understands my pain.

i hope this is helpful for anyone interested in watching some hcav movies but not sure where to start... i suppose i am now some sort of authority on the matter, though i didnt intend to become one lmao.

im very excited for his upcoming roles, both in the romance The Rosie Project, and in the rumored Highlander film. not to mention an Enola Holmes sequel (!!!) and..... Argylle, which i will make myself watch because i am now committed. hopefully i can find some way to distract myself from his truly terrible hair... though i never would've started my marathon if i hadn't been disgusted by his haircut in Argylle, and then immediately wanted to see him as a spy with GOOD hair. so i suppose i have to thank it, which i will do by sitting through the whole movie. thank you and you're welcome, mr. cavill (EDIT: it turned out great 10/10, yay!)

if anyone likes this enough or cares, i can update it to include more henry cavill movies as they come out! <3

[casgirl]

i think My Favorite supernatural writers are:

1. Dabb ❤️️ he’s the architect!! the mastermind!!! dabbnatural made it all worth it! dabbnatural was fun and sweet and was clearly pitched with destiel in mind AND he created JACK. plus his indivudual episodes (THEE prisoner, alpha and omega, hunter heroici, weekend at bobby’s!, WATCHTOWER AND MORIAH) are REALLY solid. i maintain that he’s the Best at writing dean

2. berens of COURSE he’s the king!! dabb gets the top spot for being the showrunner but berens is CLEARLY the best writer every single one of his episodes has been fantastic and like. I know we all know about the confession but it was SO gorgeously written like come ON. plus he also seems like a very cool person. 

3. yockey he’s FUN i ADORE him he and berens have the best grasp on how to write cas. he like Gets the tone of dabbnatural perfectly and should’ve been the head writer for a banes twins spinoff bc twigs twine and tasha banes was a Perfect backdoor pilot.

4. davey perez ❤️️ i know people slander him bc he writes dean as stupid and i dont care. he’s the BEST at writing the cas and jack dynamic (gimme shelter IS the best overall episode of 15.2, despair wasn’t as good until the confession). and tombstone was FUN stuck in the middle with you was EXCELLENT mint condition is one of the FEW WATCHABLE CAS-LESS EPISODES. i think dean girls need to calm down and enjoy people treating your favorite character like a joke like cas girls do.

5. glynn. i still haven’t totally forgiven her for unity. but like its the same w dabb and carry on like it’s ok girl i know its not your fault bc she’s great and she co wrote the future which is the best episode of all time. and she was INSTRUMENTAL in the divorce arc w golden time. i’m a feminist

6. honorable mentions to robbie thompson (who WILL be the first to talk) carver for the rapture, and edlund for being the inside man during the gamble era foiling all her plans like a little cartoon mouse inside a robot. but i’m a dabbnatural purist first and foremost.

[fluffytuffles]

rambling thoughts on moscow 2005 (LQ proshoot)

A pretty close replica of the original show (I believe London-based)

Most of the characters don’t make much of an impression, at least if you’re already familiar with the show. I imagine if it’s your first version then it’s great.

Teazer is adorable and I am a lesbian.

Victoria, Tumblebrutus, and Pouncival are adorable. Victoria and Pounce seem like good friends and Tumble makes biscuits.

By Act 2 I was mostly just bored, unfortunately.

Skipped Growltiger again. Didn’t like this Gus or Jelly very much either.

As usual I think they could’ve utilized Misto more as a character. Not just because he’s my favorite cat, but because he’s the one who saves the day at the end. And it’s a shame because there are moments of good character that come through when they’re allowed.

Will probably watch the Mr. Mistoffelees number again but that’s about it

6/10, perfectly watchable, probably won’t watch it again.

[oatmilkovich]

wondering if you've gotten any asks re: ethan's acting btw? i was always charmed by his early seasons ans especially carl's scenes with frank, it seemed sometimes with his more recent work, there were inconsistencies and his deliveries dont always land the way i imagine they're supposed to. still, i remember being quite struck by his screen presence in certain moments ie. when fiona was with sean and losing the house/the whole tail end of the white boy carl arc (as ridiculous as it was) and then carl's return at the end of s7, especially as everyone else was falling apart and he seemed to be keeping it all together in a really lovely way. i suppose 'is it the acting vs. the writing' is the eternall shameless question 🤔

hey <3 

i haven’t yet, so thank you for asking me. 

i adore younger carl and i think ethan’s work when he was a kid was exactly what you want for a role like that at such an age. charmed is the right word, anon. he had such great comedic timing – many of younger carl’s lines are some of my favourites from the earlier seasons, they just somehow always landed perfectly. he also had many moments of great depth – the shaving head scene being a very notable one and one of my favourites. 

he, like emma, had a great presence when they were kids. there was less thought behind their work so things felt more natural and endearing. he was a kid having fun and that was great to watch. but, i do think that he struggled going from being a kid on the show to being an adult – just like emma. once you become aware of your surroundings, what you look like, how you’re perceived – that’s when things start to get shaky. i find it difficult to believe him now and haven’t done for the last few seasons or so. things feel...a lot less personal and very much like words read off a page. it’s wooden and hard to watch a lot of the time – and definitely not done any favours by the storylines he’s been given. 

the difference for me personally lies in the writing, i think ethan’s been relatively lucky and carl’s storylines, mostly were pretty strong – or at least consistently had solid moments – up until he really committed to the army and now, unfortunately, the police. as you said, even the ridiculous white boy carl sl had a good arc to it. he was given some pretty deep and emotional stuff, so even when his acting didn’t necessarily land, the scenes and moments still invoked a reaction out of us. recently though, his storylines have been flat – that scene w the lady and the bus in season 10 being the strongest, in my opinion, for a long while. and especially now with the cop stuff, i completely zone out. it may have been different if ethan was a stronger actor and i actually believed carl’s pov on the situations he finds himself in, but i just don’t. 

i don’t know if this is what you wanted from me or if i’m just rambling, but long story short is i don’t necessarily feel like everything completely ended w ethan becoming older on the show – you mentioned carl’s return in season 7, that’s one of my favourite moments because of how it makes me feel – but things have been incredibly lacking since. carl used to be one of my favourite characters and even though ethan’s acting as an adult isn’t great, had they kept the level of depth and care (i guess? i can’t really find the right words), then his recent storylines definitely would’ve at least been more watchable – perhaps they even may have given us moments on the same level as the ones we all adore from him previously. 

does this make sense? i hope it makes sense. anyways, thanks for asking and have a wonderful day! 

<3

[thesffcorner]

Get a Life Chloe Brown

Get a Life Chloe Brown is a romantic comedy, written by Talia Hibbert. It follows Chloe Brown, a freelance web designer from a wealthy family, who one day has a near death experience. This shakes her profoundly, not just for the obvious reasons, but also because she realizes that if she were to die, she would have nothing to show for herself; no friends, no boyfriend, no adventure and no interesting events. In an effort to change that she makes a list of things to do, and meets a person that just might help her do it: Redford, her new superintendent. I was interested in this book ever since I heard it was coming out, because the premise, for whatever reason reminded me of a mix of two things: the profoundly stupid, yet profoundly watchable film What’s Your Number, and Michelle Pfeiffer’s story-line in New Years Day. This book is neither stupid nor silly; it’s one of the funniest, well written rom-coms I’ve ever read, and not since Red White and Royal Blue, have I liked two characters this much. Let’s start with the writing. I didn’t know Hibbert was British, but one page in and this book was so British it hurt. From the jokes to the banter, I felt like I was watching an episode of Bad Education, and I laughed out loud more times than I can count. Both characters are very snarky, and Chloe especially has a rather dry sense of humor that comes off as rude to others, because it’s so stiff. I found it hilarious, though the real standout for me was Red, because his internal monologues had me in stitches. Let me give you a sample of the jokes, here are a few. “We definitely have bears” “We don’t. If we had bears, it’d be in the news all the time. You know. Fine upstanding British man attacked by a bear. EU to blame. Brexit now.” Gigi appeared helpfully on her shoulder and said “Don’t mumble, darling. Nice big words. Repeat after me: ‘I want to ride you like a stallion.’” “Red snorted: ‘Who are you, Dr. Phill?’ ‘Ah, don’t start that manly crap. We talk about our feelings in this house, boy.’ ‘Can I talk about my feelings for your wife?’ ‘This bowl would be a great hat on you’” This couldn’t be more up my alley. Outside of the humor, the writing on the characters was equally well done. Not only do we get a very good sense of both Red and Chloe as individuals, but Hibbert makes the chemistry between them palpable. I believed that these two people could barely hold off from ripping each other’s clothes off, and later, when they became more emotionally invested, I believed in their romance. All the characters are well written; from Chloe’s family, especially her sisters, to Red’s friend Vic and even his mother. Because we get POVs from both Chloe and Red, I was worried they might sound the same, because both are such snarky characters, but they didn’t; they have very different personalities and ways of approaching their problems, which I found was translated quite well. The plot wasn’t particularly complex; it mostly just follows Chloe making a deal with Red so he can help her tick off things on her list, and slowly getting an understanding of what is actually important to her and what isn’t. The book does also follow Red coming to some realizations of his own, notably what he wants to do with his life, now that he’s escaped an abusive relationship. Which leads me to two points of caution for this book. The first is that the cover and the synopsis might mislead you into thinking that this is straight up comedy, which it is, but more in the vein of How to Be Single or Trainwreck. There are some really heavy topics discussed in this book: there is the aftermath of an abusive relationship, disability, trauma from loss, PTSD even, and a very brutal verbal fight that doesn’t pull punches. It’s a funny book, but it has surprising depth, and Hibbert really touches on some heavy and complicated topics, while maintaining an overall light tone. There’s even a warning on the first page of the book about some of the triggers, so tread lightly. The other point are the sex scenes. Now, readers of romance, and those who are familiar with Hibbert’s other work, will probably know that this book has sex scenes. I’ve heard from other people that they either found them extremely hot or completely over the top. I fall in the former category; the sex is explicit, but I think the scenes are paced well, are genuinely engaging and steamy and actually explore the characters, and their growing attraction to each-other. The only critique I do have is that the characters, especially Red do sound a bit OOC in them, because there’s a lot of dirty talk that is a bit much even for him, but honestly, outside of laughing at it, it didn’t personally bother me. Let’s talk about characters. There aren’t many, but each gets a moment to shine. Out of the supporting cast, my favorite was Vic, though I can’t wait for Evelyn’s book, because she seemed like a hoot too. Out of the leads, let’s start with Red. Redford, who I imagine is named after the dog, being a ginger and all is a charming, attractive and confident man, who has been through a really abusive relationship that has made him spiral into bad decision making. He has quite a few flaws, the most notable being a chip on his shoulder about being treated as a spectacle, or a commodity, by people who are richer than him and can therefore buy him in many ways; buy him for his looks, his time, his talent or just simply observe him like some kind of circus animal. I found all of his quirks understandable and well written; he does make some stupid decisions, and he seems to be incapable of saying no. But he was the better adjusted lead out of the two, which was nice. He did veer off into being a little too perfect and considerate at time, which was just a tad unrealistic, but I really liked his personality a lot. Then we have Chloe who I adored, even though she falls definitely in the tradition of quirky, type A female protagonists. She is obsessed with lists, organization, planning out her days and her life, and there’s a good reason for that: she suffers from fibromyalgia. I will admit; while I do know two people in my life who have, fibromyalgia I knew very little about the disorder. I didn’t know that it seems to be caused by trauma for one, nor did I know that it leads to brain fog or short term memory loss. I think the way the illness was described in the book, and the way it impacted Chloe’s life was presented very well; I can definitely understand and sympathize with how she had developed her coping mechanisms, the healthy and unhealthy ones. Chloe is a very strong character; she is funny, she is smart, she is witty, and what I liked most was she knew her limits, knew when to push and when to take a break, and was actively fighting to live a life she would be proud of, in spite of fibromyalgia. I really liked how well Hibbert explored both what it’s like to live with an invisible illness, and the toll it takes both on the person and those around them, but also how having an illness or a disability doesn’t mean that the person can’t take care of them-self or live a perfectly good life. I’m not disabled, so I can’t speak to that representation, but as just a humble reader who wanted to learn a bit more, I was satisfied. One other thing to note is that Chloe is both plus size and black. In terms of race I appreciated the conversation she had with Red about privilege, and I think perhaps a bit more could have been explored on that front. In terms of weight, Chloe’s weight is mentioned at several points, but it’s not really a factor. I kind of liked that; Chloe gets to be a fat girl who is content with her life, and it’s not even a factor. It was nice. Overall, this book was great. It’s funny, it’s sweet, it’s very sexy, and it tackles some deeper issues and topics like class and disability in a nuanced and lighthearted way. If you are looking for a good romance with some substance, I highly recommend it.

goodreads

[discotreque]

Picard 1.10: Et in Arcadia Ego, Part 2

I don't really do predictions or theories when I'm watching something. Partly because I prefer to go along for the ride while it's happening and wait to judge with the benefit of hindsight, but mainly because I'm very bad at it.

Anyway, let's discuss Episode 10 of Picard, in which a bunch of things happen that I would have sworn up and down were never going to happen, and a bunch of things I thought would for sure happen did not.

Spoilers for the season finale:

I think I feel about Picard S1 the same way I feel about Discovery so far: I like every single thing about it more than the writing. The casting is great, the actors are pretty much all superb, I'm horny as hell for the production design, the VFX are the best I've ever seen on television, I absolutely love Jeff Russo's music...

...and the scripts are, you know, fine. Mostly fine. Moments of excellence, no doubt, especially at the level of individual lines and scenes, but overall? New TV Trek has yet to pull off a complete season-story that really impressed me. (I have reasons for extremely high hopes re: Disco S3, but I will save them for another post.)

With all of that said: I didn't come here for the writing. I wanted to spend time with my old friend Jean-Luc Picard at the end of the 24th century, and I got it. The rest is gravy. Not, like, the awesome gravy my sister makes at Thanksgiving; decent B+ restaurant gravy. I'm still gonna dip my fries in it.

"To say you have no choice is a failure of imagination." The first great Picard line of the episode, but not the last.

Blah blah Romulan incest siblings blah blah blah. They couldn't have mentioned sooner that Narek was the family fuck-up or whatever? He would have been like 6% less boring.

Raffi and Rios constantly, lovingly dunking on each other is one of my favourite dynamics on this show.

Okay I was just joking last week about Saga's whole brain being in her eyeball but the fact that the damage to her eye fucked up her memories...

Why are they sitting outside the ship having a campfire? Isn't the ship basically fine? Why not hang out inside?

"The Thousand Days of Pain" is the name of my metal band.

Agnes using Saga's ripped-out eye to bypass the scanner had big Minority Report energy. Thank god she didn't have to chase it down a ramp while it rolled away from her.

"The way that children learn most things: by example."

RSVP Sutra, the only interestingly-written villain in this entire season. Tamlyn Tomita is super duper watchable as Commodore Oh/General Nedar (and looking fiiiine in that black uniform), but she has no personality or motivation beyond "grr, robots bad." Sutra lives in a society that's mostly twins, but her twin sister was fucking murdered. Obviously I don't agree with her actions, but I understood and cared about her motivations, which is more than I can say for any of the Romulans.

All those exterior shots of La Sirena wobbling through space with Picard at the helm were adorable.

We literally never see Narek again after the androids take him away. I hope they just threw him in a dumpster. Bye bitch.

Seven didn't do a ton of hand-to-hand combat on VOY, and she sure didn't fight like this. Jeri Ryan moves like she's heavy, like her bones are made of metal, like she's still full of dense Borg technology. She practically lumbers around, using her limbs like clubs; Peyton List bounces off her like she's hitting a solid steel wall. It's excellent choreography and so well executed by both women (and presumably their stunt doubles).

GET FUCKED, RIZZO. You were barely interesting enough to hate, but I did hate you.

"'The Picard Maneuver.' Wait, that's actually a thing, isn't it?" Ell oh ell.

Loved the way the Romulan ships' disruptors sizzled and crackled when they were powering up.

What was wrong with Planetary Sterilization Patterns 1 through 4?

That motherfucking fanfare when the Starfleet ships came in. Awwww yeah.

ACTING CAPTAIN WILL RIKER. Still kinda wish it had been Worf on the Entrepreneur, though, because I'm greedy: we already saw Riker!

I do have my problems with the writing, but I loved the way they resolved the three-way standoff between the Romulans, Starfleet, and the ch'khalagu: not with an epic space battle, but with diplomacy and self-sacrifice and trust in the essential goodness of each other. (Plus, I guess, the threat of an epic space battle.) It was so perfectly TNG in so many ways.

All the Riker stuff was so fan-servicey. Which I'm mostly fine with: I'm a fan, after all, and I like to be serviced from time to time. But it felt a little like one slice too many of chocolate cake.

I wish the tips of the tentacles had got cut off when the portal closed. That would have been cooler, right?

What can I say about watching Jean-Luc Picard die. He's been my captain for 30 years. I physically fucking felt it. And making an android copy of him, while awesome, did not really diminish the emotional impact.

On a lighter note, I need to know what Jeri and Santiago were actually drinking in that scene, because it straight-up looked like soap. Yuck.

I also really like the dynamic between Rios and Seven. They both act a little harder than they are, and I think they see through each other's acts, but there's enough mutual respect (and self-interest) there to let each other get away with it. And no romantic tension whatsoever. Delightful.

I want to hug all of them so much :(

The blank grey surface of everything in the simulation was very creepy.

Oh Data. Oh, Data. My heart was already aching and then...

Listen. Like a fucking idiot, I went and saw Nemesis on opening night. I don't even remember what I was expecting, but I do remember walking out of the theatre with my friend and agreeing never to speak of it again. Data died, but the movie was so shitty I could barely feel anything about it. This episode gave me the emotional closure I've been waiting for since December 13, 2002.

It's also, if you think about it, a pretty hilarious "fuck you" to Nemesis in general: "You guys did such a bad job of killing Data we had to bring him back to life just so we could kill him properly."

They've been slightly aging-up Patrick Stewart all season. I stopped noticing it after a while, so seeing him without it at the end was quite a shock.

"You... you haven't made me immortal?!" "Relax, man. Everyone was paying attention." Okay, Altan can stay.

Speaking of ol’ A.I., can't he just make another golem for himself? Was there something unique about the one they put Picard in?

I thought I recognized the voice of the woman singing "Blue Skies" on my first watch, but I couldn't place her. Turns out that was Isa Briones herself, which meant I cried even harder the second time through.

"And our little life is rounded with a sleep." Goodbye, Data.

Seven and Raffi???????

SEVEN AND RAFFI?????????????

And once again, Jeff Russo ends the season with a mash-up of the old theme and the new one. Give my man another Emmy! Give him two!

God damn. What a ride. Let me climb into my clown shoes for one last shitty prediction. I think next season is going to be what I wanted from this season: Picard and his motley crew of rogues bopping around the galaxy having roguish adventures. Fingers crossed!

And thanks for reading. Star Trek is always more fun with friends.

[agentnico]

After Life - Season 2 (2020) Review

Not as funny as Ricky Gervais’ Golden Globes monologue, and I remember him even mentioning at that ceremony in regards to the upcoming season that it is about a “man who wants to kill himself because his wife died of cancer… and it’s still more fun than this”. What a paradoxical irony that turned out.

Plot: In season 2, whilst still struggling with immense grief for his wife, we see Tony try to become a better friend to those around him. Each grappling with their own problems and only to be intensified by the looming threat of the local newspaper being shut down.

After Life season one I really enjoyed. It was a realistic perspective on the feeling of grief and loss, and seeing the internal struggle of Ricky Gervais’ character Tony having to force himself to continue with his life after loosing a loved one was both fascinating and heart-warming. Yes, he was being a jerk to others, but you totally understood why he was the way he was, and Gervais possible gave a career-best performance, managing to deliver his trademark dry humour whilst also managing to balance that out with a lot of gravity and emotion to his acting. There’s many times I watched him in that season and I truly connected with his character’s feelings and felt proper sorry for him. So season one ended and I thought that was it. I felt the story was over. However Netflix didn’t seem to think so, bringing us a surprising continuation, and though I questioned its purpose, I watched it regardless due to my enjoyment of the previous season. My thoughts?

Well, the adorable dog is back! The cute canine companion (did I just alliterate?) of the lead character returns, and she is wonderful. Her close bond with Tony is heart-warming to watch, and one has to wonder if this dog is Gervais’ pet dog in real life, for their natural connection is uncanny! Though an appearance on The Graham Norton Show had Gervais admit that no, in fact the German Shepherd is not his in real life, however apparently he developed a truly amazing bond with her on set. They do say dogs are a man’s best friend, and this is prime example of this! Though setting the hound aside, what does season 2 of After Life have to offer? More of the same really, and that is both good and bad. Good in the sense that it’s perfectly watchable with some good moments and an overall enjoyable viewing, however one cannot help but wonder what is the point? Yes, one can say that the theme of grief is never-ending, as can one really get over someone ever? The answer is of course no, you can never fully get over someone. However, in regards to After Life, it leaves the series in the position where it’s not really going anywhere. It’s not a bad season, just seems a bit pointless with no final destination. 

Ricky Gervais is very much a Marmite character for some. You either like him or you don’t. But it’s difficult to deny the dedicated performance he delivers in this series, this season included. There is so much going on behind his eyes in every single close-up, that one must admit that he definitely delved deep into the darkness of his own psyche to emerge with such a touching emotionally-driven heart-aching act. The rest of the ensemble cast all do well in their roles, there is but one weak link. They really need to get rid of the annoying psychiatrist character. His entire shtick is based around him vulgarly discussing his perverted horrible nature, and it’s uncomfortable and not in a funny way. There are so many scenes dedicated to this repetitive unfunny gag, if I can even call it a gag. Funnily enough, the actor that plays him, Paul Kaye, also starred in the indie-musical film Anna and the Apocalypse and I hated him in that too. Maybe it’s just that I do not like the actor? No, it can’t be! I’m not biased at all! 

Season 2 of After Life is more of the same. If you enjoyed the first season you will most likely have a pleasant watch of this season, but one has to wonder where all of this is going? Netflix will probably green-light a third season, but is there any story left to tell?

Overall score: 6/10

[freemanswood]

EDINBURGH FILM FESTIVAL REVIEWS

Ode To Joy: Martin Freeman shines in delightfully heartwarming rom-com (Review)

SERENA SEGHEDONI

JUNE 28, 2019

Jason Winer’s clever drama about a man who can’t experience happiness is a funny, uplifting, insightful story that surprises us with hilarious sequences and witty dialogues and features impressive performances by Martin Freeman, Morena Baccarin and Melissa Rauch.

What if experiencing strong emotions made your body shut down for hours? And what if the feeling that triggered you the most was the most important emotion of all? The protagonist of Jason Winer’s Ode to Joy (played to perfection by Martin Freeman) is a man who suffers from cataplexy, a symptom of narcolepsy that does just that: every time he feels an emotion to an extent he can’t control with “unhappy thoughts”, he collapses on the floor. And, though feelings such as anger, surprise and fear definitely affect him, the one that triggers him the most is the very same emotion that makes one’s life worth living: happiness.

I’m not just talking about that kind of happiness caused by one in a lifetime experiences. Charlie’s neurological disease can be triggered by seeing a mother holding her child, or by noticing a particularly cute animal while walking down the street. In fact, it can even be provoked by thinking about the feeling. And so, while major events are definitely risky, so are stories with a happy ending, cheerful music and unsolicited comments from strangers. If we stop to consider how many times we happen to think of something that makes us smile, it’s not hard to understand that, when we first meet Charlie, his life is not exactly the definition of easy.

With this premise, Ode to Joy could have easily turned out to be one of those mushy, predictable stories we’ve already seen a hundred times before, one that would focus on the illness and try to make us cry as much as is humanly possible. Instead, Jason Winer’s thoroughly enjoyable drama is an uplifting, endearing, genuinely hilarious and widely entertaining romantic comedy with likeable characters, delightfully absurd sequences, unpredictable turns of events and more than one lesson to teach.

We first meet Charlie (Martin Freeman) at a wedding, the perfect occasion to get familiar not only with our protagonist’s “adorable quirk”, as his brother Cooper (Jake Lacy) would later describe it, but also with his special brand of humour, that will keep us company throughout the film. Charlie’s coping mechanism consists in thinking “unhappy thoughts” whenever his cataplexy is about to overcome him. He has gotten used to avoiding happy situations and seeing the negative side of everything, and his daily routine is an endless source of perfectly timed and extremely funny sequences that keep us company for the entire duration of the film. And, while most of the credit is due to the excellently written screenplay, it needs to be said that Martin Freeman is absolutely perfect for the role.

Although we don’t always agree with the choices he makes, Charlie’s dry humour and expressive glances make him so relatable that he connects with us instantly, as a victim of circumstance whose absurdly comic endeavours can’t help but make us burst into laughter every time he says or does something out of the ordinary. And, just when you think you know where the film is headed, here comes an unexpected character or event that changes everything and makes you fall in love with Ode to Joy all over again.

The first surprising character is Charlie’s love interest, Francesca (Morena Baccarin). If our unhappy hero is the pessimistic but likeable protagonist Ode to Joy needed, Francesca is his perfect match and the one person who is able to balance out his sarcastic comments with her warmth and spontaneity. When we first meet her, she has just been publicly (and hilariously) dumped by an ex-boyfriend who couldn’t even begin to understand her, and who intentionally picked a public library to tell her the news, so as to prevent her from making a scene. Needless to say, Francesca does make a scene, and that is when Charlie, who happens to work at that very same library, intervenes. Which leads to a series of events that put to the test all the defence mechanisms he has put into place to keep all kinds of pleasant emotions out of his life.

There are so many reasons why it simply shouldn’t work between Charlie and Francesca, and yet they end up presenting us with a love story that is not only the source of many hilarious scenes, but also very real. The chemistry between the two leading characters (and the two leading actors) is undeniable, but there’s more than that. Ode to Joy enfolds in a completely unexpected way that keeps us guessing until the end, which is a very rare thing to find in a romantic comedy these days. It’s also what makes Winer’s gem of a film so compelling and so very watchable.

If Charlie and Francesca are the two protagonists of this story, they are not the only characters worth mentioning. Charlie’s little brother Cooper (Jake Lacy) is an excellent wingman: not only he provides much of the comic relief in the film, but his character is absolutely essential in this movie. Cooper helps move the narrative in unexpected directions, as he is much more impulsive and less empathic than his restrained brother, and Lacy’s performance brings his character to life in a very believable way.

Jane Curtin also makes an appearance as Sylvia, Francesca’s closest relative and source of infinite wisdom. Aunt Sylvia is yet another brilliantly written character who approaches a serious subject in an unconventional, unexpected way, acting as a guide for Francesca and helping us understand her motives and actions. It’s thanks to Aunt Sylvia that Ode to Joy can remain the funny comedy it is, while also approaching complex themes such as fear and loss in an immensely moving way.

But Ode to Joy‘s surprises aren’t over, as its most impressive character only shows up halfway through the movie. Played by The Big Bang Theory‘s Melissa Rauch, Bethany is Francesca’s hilariously boring co-worker and, therefore, perfect “girlfriend material” for Charlie – at least, according to Cooper. From the moment she unexpectedly makes an appearance, Rauch absolutely owns every single scene she’s in. We don’t even care if it takes our attention away from Charlie and Francesca: we can’t get enough of seeing her in (slow) action. And it’s not just her fascination with the most tedious subjects and her long, improbable speeches that make us laugh: Bethany is also responsible for the film’s funniest moment by far, a meme-worthy scene you wish you could rewind over and over again.

Ode to Joy is an unconventional, poignant, hugely enjoyable and wildly entertaining drama that combines the right amount of dry humour with a series of witty, well-timed and surprisingly meaningful turns of events. It presents us with a series of believable, well-rounded characters, it keeps us entertained with clever dialogues and twists, it touches upon serious issues with extreme delicacy and it ultimately sends across a thought-provoking, heartwarming, beautiful message.

Ode to Joy had its European premiere at the Edinburgh Film Festival on 22nd June, 2019 and it was so well-received that it was chosen to be part of the Festival’s “Best of the Fest” Strand: another screening has been planned for 30th June, and tickets are on sale at this link.

[cipherhunter]

sonic the hedgehog was good!!! it wasn’t a disaster!!! it was perfectly watchable and enjoyable!! here are some of my rough and jumbled up thoughts (spoilers ahead): - sonic’s characterisation in the movie was probably the most three-dimensional we’ve seen him in the entire franchise. he’s adorable, endearingly kooky, free-spirited, courageous, but also lonely and vulnerable as he tries to find his place in a world where he struggles to adapt. i thought ben schwartz was well cast as sonic’s VA. he did a great job in capturing sonic’s spectrum of emotions and overall personality, which i think was further aided by his genuine passion for the character and the games. - it was fun seeing tom wachowski’s relationship with sonic unfold - basically from reluctant babysitter to proud father - throughout the film. he definitely shined the most in his interactions with sonic, as well as the few stand-offs he had with robotnik.  - which ofc brings me to my personal highlight: the 300 IQ twirly-tached black-clad mad man that is dr. robotnik. jim carrey’s portrayal of robotnik was delightfully unhinged and self-centered. he commanded every scene he was in, reflecting robotnik’s inflated pride and need to be in control of any given situation (until he comes to the uneasy realisation that for the first time ever, he’s not, thanks to that dastardly hedgehog!). his sprightly villain dance number to the song ‘where evil grows’ (selected from his ‘tunes of anarchy’ song library no less) was a joy to see on the big screen! his physicality was on par with some of his performances from the 90s. you can tell that carrey had the time of his life embracing a role perfectly tailored to his brand of chaos and eccentricity. he’s still got it!!  - nothing much to say about the story, really. it was serviceable and simple to follow, as one would expect from what is essentially a family friendly popcorn flick. the film’s main focus was in fleshing out sonic’s character.  - lots of references to satisfy the more die-hard sonic fans out there. - obviously not a perfect film by any means. there were some plot holes and inconsistencies and worn out cliches and cheesy, dated humour and product placement (albeit used sparingly), but honestly?? it didn’t really bother me. sure no one really does the floss anymore, but it was perfectly in line with sonic’s character. sure, tom wachowksi was a wanted terrorist for two thirds of the movie and hardly anyone batted an eye despite his face being all over the news, but it did add a layer of hilarity to his predicament. at the end of the day it succeeded in what it set out to do: it kept me entertained and engaged, it gave sonic’s character a newfound depth, and it made me curious to see where movie!sonic’s journey will take us going forward! i can breathe out a sigh of relief in saying that this was the sonic blockbuster movie adaptation we needed and deserved!  - THAT POST-MID CREDITS SCEEEENNNE!!!! like many of you i already knew what the scene would uhh... entail... no thanks to youtube, but it didn’t make me any less excited to see it!!  ok now give us a director’s cut using the original sonic design when it comes out on dvd/blu-ray